The Heart vs. Logic in Love

I really like today's Love Quote of the Day

"Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence."
H. L. Mencken

I have a GREAT imagination and he has GREAT intelligence.
So does that mean I will triumph after all? lol

I know not all women have good imaginations like I do, nor are all men intelligent like my Best Friend. lol So I am going to use the word Heart (or love) in place of imagination and Logic in place of intelligence.

Or maybe it means that a person's own imagination triumphs over their own intelligence in order for them to feel love for someone else.

Hmmmm? If it is a man, that isn't very likely to happen.
Their logic will override whatever little bit their heart might feel. In other words, a man will suppress any emotions they have, before they get a chance to grow.

Damn, why can't men sometimes think with their hearts instead of their brain! (Some men don't even have a brain) They think only with their other head, the one with NO brain at all! Emotionless Vulcan's!! Except for anger that is. Men are good at expressing anger. The ONLY emotion they allow themselves to feel!

Ok I am not being fair here. I know that some men are not anger ridden, brainless selfish bastards. Some men are not too afraid of themselves and how the world sees them to actually be sensitive!

I know a few men who are actually thoughtful, caring and sensitive. Unfortunately most men are not.

Women think with their hearts first, and then will think with their mind. This does get a lot of women into trouble. They fall in love without even thinking about what they are doing. Sometimes they don't even realize that is what is happening.

Women open their hearts and give their whole heart, and fall in love before the man even is aware she has done so. The woman gives all of herself and more. She risks her heart, and falls in love with a man, even if he doesn't return those same feelings.

The man is taken back, because to him it is too soon. He doesn't feel she should love him that quickly. For a man usually, love takes time to grow. He thinks about it logically and will only open a little bit of his heart at a time. He uses logic to protect himself from being hurt. If he doesn't give his heart or only a little bit, then if something goes wrong he will not be as hurt. What the man doesn't realize is that in order for him to find love, he has to risk his heart also and open up to the woman. He can be loved by the woman, but for him to love her in return he has to risk his heart. He can be as logical as he wants, but when it comes to love, logic plays no part in it. Love is NOT logical. Love just Is.

"Love will not find you,
If you risk not your heart"
Erin O'Malley

Women also who have risked their heart too many times, will hold back and not risk their heart again so easily. Some women have had a hard live growing up, and never learned to trust. Therefore they will not risk their heart. They will have a hard time trusting anyone, especially a man if it was a man in her childhood that hurt her. Unfortunately some women as they become teens, and then adults, become real Bitches! They care about nobody, not even themselves. They are miserable and make others feel the same way they do. There are a lot of men like this too.

It is even harder for a man that has been hurt many times. They are programmed by society from childhood to not cry, to not show emotion, to be strong, and tough. Never expose how the truly feel about things. It is horrible that society does this to young boys and men! Parents of the young boys are no better than society. Fathers tell their sons to be tough, not to cry, and be a man. They are only kids, and are very sensitive still, and yet are taught to suppress those emotions and not talk to anyone about them.

By the time the boys become young men are interested in women, they don't know how to communicate well with women or other men. They surly don't show their true feelings to women. That would be Un-manly! Give me a break! Sheesh! I hate it when a man feels he has to be MANLY to be liked. To me that means, being cold, emotionless except for anger, and selfish. Unwilling to talk things out, they will make the decisions and not consider the woman's feelings about anything. They act all tough and controling. They don't show any tenderness or caring about the woman in their life, especially in public. They see tenderness, kindness, and being loving to women as being weak. They might be somewhat loving in the privacy of their own home, and even there behind closed doors.

Men mostly think logically. They don't see that a lot of times their logical ways of doing things, just hurts the woman. He doesn't try to see things from her point of view. He just decides what is to be and that is it. Again not all men are like this, but so many are that it's a wonder women put up with them at all!

That is when Love comes into it. A woman who loves a man even when he acts like a total jerk, and does not respect her at all, will put up with it. Not all women, but those who love unconditionally do. That unconditional love that some women have, gets them into trouble that they can't get out of.

Many women do not realize how much they are falling in love, and that it is unconditional love, until it is too late. Most men don't deserve that kind of unconditional love. Women like this get into abusive relationships and even marry them because they love the man so unconditionally. They love the man more than themselves, and will even tell themselves that they deserve the beatings that they get. A woman who loves unconditionally is very easy to be taken advantage of, because she will not give up on him, no matter how much he hurts her. This kind of man will only be logical, or maybe a bit crazy too. He will never open his heart up to her, no matter how unconditionally the woman loves him. Logic plays no part in love, and he can not let go of logic long enough to allow his heart to be vulnerable enough to feel love.

Unconditional love is a blessing, and it can be a curse also. Mothers who love their kids so unconditionally that they are blinded by any wrong their kids to, ends up hurting them in the long run. They give the signal that it is ok to be bad, when the Mother never punishes them for things they do wrong, because they don't think the can do anything wrong.

If their kids get into trouble, they try and make excuses for their kids instead of teaching their kids not to do it again! Even Unconditional love needs some conditions. Otherwise the abused wife will never get out of that situation, and the Mother who loves her kids so unconditionally that she will never set ground rules, or consequences for their actions.

The heart needs to have some balance with the mind. I know I said there is no logic in love, and there isn't. There can be love, and logic balanced in the same person. If it is balanced then the logic will not override the heart, and the person will still be able to love. Then when logic is needed, it can put the heart in check so the heart doesn't go too far to fast. Unfortunately with men, if they try this it ends up putting a choke hold on the heart. Then the heart is suppressed and can not feel. This is when logic goes too far and is not balanced with the heart. You need both love and logic separately and independent of each other in the same person.

You can have one and not the other, but it just ends up to be hard to live with a person who is purely logical with no love. Imagine trying to live with a pure Vulcan for the rest of your life! Some of these people become obsessive compulsive. They have to have logic applied to every single thing they do. Order becomes an obsession. They can not communicate well with others, they are selfish, and care not for what other people feel by what they say. If they hurt others it doesn't bother them. Logic without opening your heart to love, only causes grief to yourself and others. A purely logical person will not think that fun is logical. They are not very pleasant people to be around. They have lost their childlike heart, they no longer have the little boy or little girl inside them that gives them a spark of life. This is also the kind of person who can turn into a criminal much easier. They do not care what people they hurt to get what they want. They have no heart, so therefor nothing to tell them that what they are doing is wrong. The heart is part of what your conscience comes from. A person who does not ever open their heart to love, and is just logical, does not feel bad when the do something wrong. Those are just some examples of what it would be like to not live with an open heart, and only be logical. We are not Vulcan's, we are human, therefore we are not capable of being purely logical without a heart or emotion, and have no consequences. You lose a part of your humanity without allowing part of your heart to open to love.

A person who is purely ruled by their heart and has no logic at all, ends up making a lot of mistakes because they don't ever think things through. These people are impulsive, and driven only by their wants and desires. They are probably not good at managing money, because they want to spend it to by whatever their heart desires. They don't plan, so they are probably usually late to everything. A person that is thinks with only their heart will fall in love easily, but maybe with the wrong person. They do not think about if that person is right for them or not. They do not look past the surface of the person they are attracted to. They only go on their feelings, not any logic that might have told them that this man is abusive, or this woman just wants your money. These people get hurt easily because they do not think about what they are doing before getting involved with someone. If they had logic as well as love, they would have taken a step back and looked good at the person they were attracted to first. Instead by the time they realize that they have made a mistake in who they are with, they are so deeply in love that they don't want to let go even if it hurts them even more.
When logic is not part of a person who lives by their heart, it will cause them a lot of problems in life. As you can see by the examples I have given here.

People need both an open heart to find love, and love balanced to lead a good productive and happy life. This does not guarantee that it will be a happily ever after kind of life, but it will give the person more of a chance of finding happiness in life. Those without heart and those without logic will ultimately, be very unhappy in the end.

May Love Find Your Heart -
Countess